CERTIFICATE OF EXEMPTION

THIS CERTIFICATE CLEARS THE BEARER (LOYAL AND OBEDIENT MEMBER OF THE BODY OF CHRIST) OF ANY RESPONSIBILITY REGARDING HIS/ HER WORKS OF FAITH, AND FRUIT THAT LASTS - WHEN REPORTING TO THE THRONE OF JESUS CHRIST, - TO BE TESTED WITH FIRE, OR TO BE AWARDED A CROWN OF ETERNAL LIFE (PLEASE).

FURTHERMORE, I (THE PASTOR/ REVEREND/ FATHER/ DOMINIE) ........................................ OF THE CONGREGATION (NAME OF CONGREGATION)...................................., OF THE CHURCH DENOMINATION ........................................................., & MY CHURCH BOARD/ ELDERS, - EXONERATE THE BEARER (NAME & SURNAME OF CHURCH MEMBER) ....................................................................................................... OF ANY RESPONSIBILITY TO ACT AS A SPIRITUALLY MATURE CHRISTIAN WHO TRIED TO BE OBEDIENT TO THE RULES OF MEN WHEN HE/SHE TRIED TO REPORT TO THE CHURCH/ MISSIONS ORGANISATION FOR DUTY, - ACCORDING TO TALENTS, GIFTS IN THE SPIRIT, CALLING IN JESUS CHRIST, PERSONAL MINISTRY AND MISSIONS TASK.

BE ASSURED THAT THE PASTOR (EXCLUSIVELY QUALIFIED AND WISE) AND HIS PERSONALLY ELECTED (BLIND/ BLINDED) ELDERS, ARE ACTING ON YOUR BEHALF, AND THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TO PARTAKE IN THE ONE-FOLD MINISTRY;- COME TO CHURCH ON SUNDAY MORNING/ EVENING, WEDNESDAY EVENING, PARTAKE OF COMMUNION AND BAPTISM, AND TO TITHE ABUNDANTLY FOR PURPOSES OF SALARIES AND CHURCH MAINTENANCE - UNTIL YOUR DEATH FORCES US TO FIND SOME NEW CHURCH MEMBERS AGAIN.

You need not be concerned at all, - that despite 2006 years of opportunities in theology, church apathy and Great Omission missions conduct, - your community is a mess, and two thirds of the world remain unreached, whilst one third is divided in the church. The fact that mature and Holy Spirit equipped Christians are not made aware, encouraged, prepared, anointed and sent to serve in community and in the world should not be questioned - lest you upset the traditional order, habits and practices (of perpetuating eternal death and idolatry) of the Pharisees, previous generations, Freemasons, and our forefathers. Just sit down in the church benches, nod your head up and down when spoken to, and stay down/quiet.

Finally, you are most certainly uneducated (we don't accept your experience/ qualification), and you do not understand what the Holy Spirit empowers you to do in God's kingdom on earth, as it is in heaven - despite attending church regularly and listening to (competent) preachers for more than half your life.

Keep this certificate on you at all times. It is your ticket to eternity ... (where?)

PLACE EXCLUSIVE DENOMINATIONAL STAMP HERE (OTHER DENOMINATIONS WILL NOT GET YOU THERE !)

About the Author

Mr Meintjes served as both seaman and commissioned officer in the navy, and as a tug captain. He has travelled internasionally, did service in Antarctica four times, sailed around South America, survived a shipping disaster and an aircraft incident, helped to develop four small businesses, and had been involved in Christian Africa mission development since 2000. His main points of focus at present are Church functioning and Africa mission.